Plain Ignorance

I received this message from someone here in LIFEOUT.

"I symphatize with u naman, how long ka nang may AIDS? Sana mamatay ka agad para di ka na magdamay pa. (I symphatize with you, how long have you been living with AIDS? I hope you'll die sooner so that you won't infect others)"

First and foremost, as mentioned profile, I am an HIV/AIDS advocate and not an HIV Carrier.  I'm sure this guy misunderstood what I wrote in my profile. Or perhaps wasn't able to understand what I wrote and mainly replied to the word "HIV". I always get tested and my last result was negative.

Second, if ever he is talking to someone living with HIV, this guy doesn't have the authority to ask someone to die so that he won't infect other people. To be honest, I know a lot of PLHIV and they I respect them a lot because they are responsible enough.

Well, this mesage came from someone who organizes orgies and is he even sure he is safe? Better get tested, you know who you are.

People really needs to be educated and informed about what HIV/AIDS. Ignorance is deadly.

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Goodbye Bading!

I read this tweet from Jonas Bagas: "Happy New Year! Ang magpaputok ng Goodbye Bading, suuupooot!!! Joke lang. Lol."

"Goodbye Bading"?!

What is that? A firework? I really thought that is was just a joke but it's not. "Goodbye Bading" is real.  Filipinos are creative and are well known for their sense of humor but come to think of it. This is not FUNNY.

This is a form of DISCRIMINATION against gay people. "Goodbye Bading" is not a good name to be given for a firework. Why not "Goodbye Malas"? Unless these people thinks that the word BADING (Gay) is synonymous to MALAS (Jinx) or better yet a believer of the idea that gays are "salot sa lipunan" (pest in the society). People are sometimes insensitive. 

This firework costs Php. 1,500.00. Why not place your 1500 in your wallet to attract more good luck for this year instead of buying this stupidly named firework.

Below is a news I found about how LGBT people like me reacted about "Goodbye Bading":

Source: http://www.bomboradyo.com/news/latest-news/90839-goodbye-bading-na-paputok-inalmahan-ng-mga-nasa-third-sex

'Goodbye Bading' na paputok, inalmahan ng mga nasa third sex 
Thursday, 29 December 2011 07:28Umalma ngayon ang grupong tagapagtaguyod ng karapatan ng mga lesbian, gay, bisexual at transgender (LGBT) o kilala bilang grupong Ladlad matapos gamitin sa pangalan ng isang paputok ang “Goodbye Bading.”


Ayon sa pahayag ng grupo, masyadong offensive sa mga katulad nilang nasa third sex ang naturang tawag sa isang mapaminsalang paputok.


Humingi na rin sila ng tulong sa PNP para hulihin ang mga nagtitinda at gumagawa nito, matapos malamang isa sa mga illegal firecrackers ang nasabing produkto.
Sinasabing P1,500 ang presyo ng Goodbye Bading kaya kakaunti lamang ang nagtitinda nito sa mga karaniwang firecracker stand.

And just a correction, can everyone please do not refer to the LGBT people as 3rd sex because there is no such thing. We only have a diverse gender identity. That's too much negativity to start the year.

For my fellow LGBT individual who felt discrimination in their lives, here is a song for us. Happy New Year!

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My New Hobby: Veil Poi Dancing

Call me an amateur, but this new found hobby just made me win the "Best Male Star of the Night" in our company Christmas Party and is one of the performances that gave an audience impact (though based on the presentation, all of our team's performers gave their best and were well applaud by the audience). The funny thing here is that when I first started practicing my Poi Dancing, I always hit my head and my balls and that really hurts a lot. But after my performance in our Christmas Presentation, everything paid off. 

Unfortunately, since the file of our team's performance is too large, I can't upload it in youtube nor here in blogger so I uploaded some pictures here. The picture shown above shows how I used both Poi Dancing and a Yoga Pose. I am now forced to do yoga once again in order to be more flexible and fit in doing my Veil Poi dancing. I chose to do Veil Poi Dancing instead of the Fire Poi Dancing because Veil Poi Dancing can utilize my skills in contemporary dancing since I am not so into modern dancing, and the movement of the veil is more visually aesthetic. Based on the videos I watched, Veil Poi Dancing can also be used hand-in-hand with belly dancing. With or with out combination with other dances,Veil Poi Dancing still requires rhythm and good body coordination specially the hands and the torso. 

Veil Poi Dancing is now one of my cardio exercise since I gained weight after 6 months of not going to the gym, next to jogging. 

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About Me

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The SECRET and The PRAYER.

(This article was inspired from a conversation with a friend who was asking me to write about how to believe in the "Law of Attraction" but at the same time retain her faith in God.)

If you want to achieve change, the first step that you need to do is shift a frame of mindset.

People would dwell on what they cannot do and so they are restricted to what they are able to do and not what they can accomplish beyond their capabilities since you are tied to the said limitations.

Human beings are bound to certain abilities. They are not GOD. But the power of the mind is so strong that it can make you reach your goals

and dreams to come true. I once encountered

this certain philosophy on the "Law of Attraction" from the book "The Secret". This Philosophy is so empowering that it will make you think that you can really be what you want and get what you wish.

However, as a Christian, and a believer in a supreme being called "GOD", I can't accept some facts that are presented in the said theory. You are required to think that "YOU ARE GOD". I am not God. So I decided to modify some stuff in the "Law of Attraction", but still, getting the benefits of "The Secret" and enjoying a Christian life and not turning into Atheism (although actually you will not become an atheist since you still believe that there is a GOD which is yourself).

The said Philosophy would use the levels of an organism which is what I, as a Biology teacher, am teaching in the class. The human body is composed of organ systems, the organ systems made up of organs, organs came from the formations of different tissues, the tissues from cells, cell is a composition of different organic molecules (which is already from Chemistry), and molecules from atoms, and atoms , as the tiniest particle, from energy (going to Physics). In Phy

sics, we have this Theory of Conservation of Energy which states that "energy is neither created nor destroyed but it can be transformed from one form to another" therefore, ENERGY is INFINITE. This is where Humans as a God will come in. Since energy is infinity, and humans are composed of energy, humans are infinite beings therefore, equating to a human as a God. I hope I explained it well enough. BUT, I would despise this theory as a Christian, and would think that we are not God, and as the bible said, we are created from the image of God. We really were intended for perfection until the idea of EVIL came in and SIN was introduced to humans. We shall stick to the "humans made from the image of God" idea and not "humans are Gods". So as humans, we would try to be more "God-like" buy living life as taught by Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

Other issues to be discussed about the "Law of Attraction" is that you believe in the Universe which will give you what you wish if you continue expressing the positive emotions that emits positive energies and will be sent out to the Universe and then the universe will give you the same positive energy that you gave it, hence, granting your wish if you constantly believe in what you want, express the same positive emotion as when you already got your wish, and of course, avoiding negative emotions that will become negative energies and will be a hindrance to getting what you want. A good example would be acting as if you are driving your dream car and being happy that you already got it (even if you are still dreaming that you will get it one day). On a Christian point of view, I can say that, the UNIVERSE being described is actually GOD. The same method would be used in Prayers and having this strong faith in HIM. Then, if you continuously pray to God about a certain thing that you want, he would certainly grant what you pray to him.

The Law of Attraction also discusses that you will not get what you wish in an instant. I forgot the right term but it's something about the rule on time delay. And as a Christian, I can refer to it as "in GOD's time". He would answer your prayers not in an instant and the moment you want it, but in God's time, he will. Hope. Pray. Believe. Some prayers may not be answered, this is because, God is planning something better for you.

"The Secret" also teaches us to be gratified and enjoy all the things that you currently have. This will enable you to send out as many positive energies to the universe and you will live a better life full of happiness. In our prayers, we are taught to say the lines thanking GOD for everything that he has given us first and not BEG for what we want from the beginning of our prayers. This is a sign of gratitude for the things that he has given us. The mere fact that you can say the prayer and you are alive to pray to God, you should already be thankful, what more about the things that you are living with aside from the gift of life?

But, if you will ask me what will work better? The Law of Attraction or the Prayer? I am not to say what to believe because as individuals we have our free will. And as a Christian, God gave you that free will and you will have to use it wisely. However, as for me, prayer is very powerful. You don't have to go to church just to pray, no matter where you are, God will listen to you. You just need to show how eager you are and how faithful you are to HIM. The same principles used in "the secret", it's just that, it's an all Christian manner of faith.

After all this discussion, I would like to talk about a famous Filipino saying "Nasa Diyos ang Awa, nasa tao ang gawa". So no matter how hard you pray, or in Law of Attraction, how badly you think of all this positive emotions just to get what you want, as an individual, you have to ask yourself, what am I doing to get what I wish for? And if you will not get you want, you will turn to God and say that he doesn't exist at all? Or question his ability since he can't grant what you have been praying to him even if you walked with your knees from the entrance of the church to the altar? Or quit praying forever because your loved one died and you have been praying the rosary all day just to spare his/her life? Oh come on!

Try to reflect.

Think.

Evaluate.

Don't blame God. It is still you and you alone. God might be offering something better but you did not listen. God might be asking you to accept and be gratified with what you have but you still seek things that you don't have. God loves you so much that he gave his only begotten son for you, for your salvation, and that is THE SECRET: an eternal life for you.

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Hanggang Dito na Lamang at Maraming Salamat: Term Ender

De La Salle University’s 3rd Term for School Year 2008-2009 is not yet over but I would like to create my term ender article as early as now. I might not have the time when the finals week comes in and I have to review for two (2) comprehensive final examination in Microbiology and Cell Biology (tough ones I have for this term).

I felt so awkward when I went back to school. Siyempre I had to adjust from being an employee back to being a student again. There was even a time when I wanted to return to my previous work because I miss my colleagues so much, and, also, I am so dependent, once again, to my parents. Some people would think that I am rich because I left my job to study, which is so wrong; I am living with Php.70.00 per day and I had to sell my cellphone just to purchase my textbook in Microbio and Cellbio subjects, I don’t need it anyway. Yeah right, I had the money for my tuition fee alone, na kasya sa 4 subjects. Haha. Masarap magtrabaho kasi kumikita ka ng pera, pero kailangang magbalik sa pag-aaral para magka-diploma.

At first, I was an outcast in each subject I enrolled in because they are block sections. Pero ang lola niyo ma-PR. I made new friends, specially Trish and my former high schoolmate Abby who made my return to DLSU a nice memory to ponder. Aside from them, I became close to some, but not all, of my classmates in my subjects. Wow, siyempre bakla eh. PR dito. PR dun. Naging close ko sa lahat yung mga kapwa ko "iregular". Thank goodness, there are no homophobic people in my classes. Pero there are some topics in a certain subject that deems homosexuality as immorality, saan pa, eh di sa Religion! Nagtaka ka pa. Hehehe.

I love being a student again. I had to read. Read more. And then, I have to read over and over again. This is a habit that I had to recover since the things that I have to browse before are work related like visa application, medical certificates, and even fake credentials submitted my applicants. Now, I feel the challenge of my academic life and I still have one year to adventure with by reading my reference materials.

Microbiology & Cell Biology
These are my most serious subjects. Obvious ba? Name pa lang di ba! Dito ako nagsusunog ng kilay. Pero impressively, I thought I lost my passion for Biology, but now, my neurons are craving for more mental stimulation. Echos. I can’t comment more on these courses because I can only speak of technical terms and critical life processes taught in the class. Well, the professors often assume that the students should know the concepts on Biochemistry, Botany2, or Histology, well; I don’t have those subjects in my flowchart because my degree is not a pre-med! I am a future teacher, a high school teacher. Hahaha. So I had to adapt to this kind of teaching method, well, what do you know, I’m not just passing these two subjects, I am one of the highest scorer when it comes to quizzes and long exams. Echos ulit!

RELSFOR (Religion: Christian Social Teaching)
This subject teaches us to have an advocacy for the poor. Hmmm. Ironically, I belong to the mass and I had to debate on the issues such as the main causes of poverty. Kailangang ipagtanggol no, ang iginigiit ba eh nagcocommit ng sins ang mga mahihirap dahil nagnanakaw sila. Excuse me, nagnanakaw sila dahil naghihirap sila dahil wala silang makain due to extreme poverty caused by improper allocation of wealth by the greedy and corrupt people who are in power! However, there are three incidents that occurred in the classroom strikes me the most during my term and it is a about my gender identity. The first one was when we were discussing about sins and evils when my professor declared that having a pre-marital relationship (I think it included sex) between two men is much graver than a man and a woman couple having a relationship before being married. No offense to my prof, I still love her but not the topic. Second was when I had to erase the word homosexuality TWICE and replaced it with adultery and murder in my two of my group mate’s paper to the list of crimes that needs corporal punishment in the Old Testament. Mamamatay tao ba ang mga bakla para ihelera sa abortion?!? Lastly, when a group reporting on one of the catholic encyclicals and sited that HOMOSEXUALITY IS ONE OF THE CULTURAL SINS. My professor commented, “kawawa naman sila, bakit nailagay dyan”, then the reporter answered, “because it is written in the encyclical that it is a cultural sin”. What I did was I acted as if I heard nothing, I continued reading “KUNG PAANO KO PINATAY SI DIANA ROSS” while placing the book in front ofmy face, making the picture of a GAY impersonator visible to the reporter. Deadma. Talk to Diano Ross! Charing.

LITERA (Philippine Literature)
I thought that this would be the most boring subject that I would have but contrary to this previous belief, Philippine Literature under Mr. Genaro Gojo-Cruz is a very empowering subject for me. First of all I was the class clown in this class. I would crack some jokes when people are reporting or even when we are viewing films, siyempre tatawa sila and those simple giggles and laughter are music to my ears. Ito naman ang silbi ko sa mundo, ang magpasaya ng tao. And in this subject was my first report after three years and I had to inculcate the remaining knowledge I have in teaching which eventually lead to regaining my self confidence. There are two readings that I love the most and these are “Kung Paano ko Pinatay si Diano Ross” by Rody Vera and “Hanggang Dito na Lamang at Maraming Salamat” written by Orlando Nadres. Madaming lines na sobrang ganda sa "hanggang dito na lamang", and gustong gusto ko ang character ni Julie, ang totoong pangalan ay JULIUS CEAZAR AQUINO, biruin mo, same pa kami ng surname! Both literary works discusses homosexuality and the struggle for acceptance. BONGGA! NAKARELATE AKO. Siyempre best in recitation ang lola niyo. Napag-usapan kasi lahat gaya ng mga GAY LINGO wherein bentang benta ang word na LOTLOT AND FRIENDS.

I love my Literature class. Sobra!

Lastly, I voted for Vernon of Santugon for VP Activities in the Student Council Election. He is gay and unfortunately he lost. I love his speech that whatever he is (pertaining to his gender identity) it is the leadership he offers to his fellow students that matters. I wanted him to win, sobra. Last year a gay candidate run but eventually lost to the incoming student council president. Did they lose because of what they are? But how come Simoun Ferrer won the presidency? I wasn't there so I can't tell. I did not vote straight despite of my political affiliation. Let them condemn and hate me for my vote yet I will stand for what I think is right and to conform is something I can not do. I am now apolitical.

Three years. Yeah. That was a long time of waiting. But it paid off. Because my three years of being out from the academe brought fort a new chapter in my life and that is my enlightenment which gave me a new purpose to live for. And that is to be of help to my people. People like me who needed guidance and comfort upon venturing to the fierce world of uncertainty and unacceptance and hoping that one day, alam mo na, cliché na nga toh eh, tanggapin na ng buong mundo kung ano ako. Kung ano tayo. Yun lang. Tatlong taon akong nawala sa school, and pagbalik ko, hindi na ako ang Raffy na naglilihim kung ano ako! Ang ako na hindi nasabi kay Louis Pieraz na minsan sa buhay ko naminahal ko siya dahil wala akong lakas ng loob at pilit na isinusulat sa mga tulang kinimkim na lamang sa limot. Nakakaloka! Tanggap ko na sa sarili ko kung ano ako. Tanggapin man ako o hindi ng lipunang ginagalawan ko.

Hanggang dito na lamang at maraming salamat!

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An Assault and Insult To My Ethnicity

I came accross with this e-mail in one of my e-group which I find very insulting to the Kapampangans like me. The message goes something like this:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/downe/
Common Signs Nga Mga Kapampangan (Except yung Konting Matitino)
Wed Mar 4, 2009 5:36 pm

1. Nangunguna sa kalaswaan
2. Nagunguna sa nakawan (pati susi papaduplicate), maski brief ipapanakaw or
nanakawin
3. Nagunguna sa bentahan droga
4. Nangunguna sa mga pampatulog at set ups
5. Baligtad underwear pag may operations.
6. Walang nagpapakita ng sinampay kasi puro nakaw damit
7. Nakatingin sa kisame pag umiihi
8. Closed mga bahay
9. Walang lumalabas
10. Me singsing sa huling paa
11. Mahilig sa mga tattoo sa me paanan.
12. Grupo kung lumakad
13. PURO LEFT SIDE PARATI NG BUILDING OR LUGAR. LEFT SIDE DIN NG URINAL MGA IHI.
14. Nagpapali-palit mga rooms.
15. Marumi ang kalat pinagkainan
16. Hindi patas kung lumaban
17. Magaling sa sabwatan
18. Puro kins lang tatanggap
19. Mga tamad magtrabaho
20. Parating late
21. Puro hon at hon-deal system di pwede ng hard work.
22. Walang goal sa buhay, puro sex lang kaya napapag-iwanan. Ayan nangyari ke
Pimentel, binalot lang publicity pero tanga pa rin hangang ngayon.

Even if you guys have disputes against Koko Pimentel and to whatever he did, never generalize our ethnic group with all of those negative traits that you mentioned above. Try reviewing the title of the message, it has the phrase "Except yung konting matitino". And what does that connote? There are only a handful of good Kapampangans and majority are criminals, perverts, back fighters, thieves, etc.? This is very discriminating and an unjust way of describing us, the Kapampangans. Social labeling sucks. And what's next? Commit genocide upon us?

You don't have the rights to ruin the dignity of one group just because of the mistakes done by a few people. No one does. The evil encompassed by the specific person is not the evil of the whole group where he belongs. This is damaging OUR, in reference to the Kapampangans, institution, and culture.

Despite the fact that we have geographical distance and different dialects spoken, we must not forget that we are all Filipinos and are living in one country as one nation. This is one of the reason why our country is not developing and can not push the progress that we are dreaming of. My friends, there is a cold war within our very own system and leads to hatred and prejudice from one ethnic group, to another.

I am gay and I am a PROUD KAPAMPANGAN!

Mayap a aldo kekayu ngan!

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Kung Hei Fat Choi

The Rabbit (1915, 1927, 1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987, 1999) can look forward to a better in 2009 Year of the Ox because of the number of stars of relationships shining on him in the year of the Ox. After going through many changes like reunions, separations, heated arguments and changing jobs, things will be more stable and favorable for him.

The star of Harmony Yue De symbolizes excellent human relationships and it can turn dangers into opportunities. This means that the Rabbit will be having people around him taking good care of him and supporting all his needs. The star Sui He is a star that represents harmony between spouses. This star can also help the Rabbit get support from his supervisors and/or superiors as well as from elderly family members.

Two stars, Tao Hua and Xian Chi, which are stars of Love Luck are working together to make the Rabbit be more attractive and charming than ever before. For married Rabbits however, it is advised that they practice extreme caution and try hard to resist temptations. Because with the two stars shining on them, they might be overwhelmed by people who will show interest in them, no matter what their gender maybe, or else they might become involved in love triangles. These people will do anything just to please them. For Single Rabbits, it is a good year to pursue that love interest because there is a good chance that they will be accepted.

Lastly, the stars Xiao Hao and Si Fu are two stars that the Rabbit should be aware of and take extra caution with. Because Xia Hao represents minor financial loss, which could be brought about by the money spent in entertaining more friends and lovers. Si Fu on the other hand represents an elderly male family member who might suffer from health which should be given special attention to.

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My 2009 Horoscope and Personal Blahs

Last week, before ending the year, I talked with a friend of mine whose view is quite different. He's the type of gay who wouldn't engage in rallies againts discrimination. His statements are somewhat discouraging me to stop what I am doing because I dont have a future in it since this country is not ready to face the reality that we do exist. Although he's accepting the fact that we are JUST TOLERATED and he is contented with that kind of idea and wouldn't care more if we will be accepted or not. The hell he cares if he is not properly treated as long as he is not stepping on other people's lives and is doing all the best to be respected. Well, my only reply was I am happy fighting for equality. I may be able to find my place in this society but how about those who can't since they are being discriminated againts. This is not just for myself but for all the LGBT people out there who can't get out of their closets or those who are maltreated because of their gender identity.

At first I was wondering if I will listen to him or not because he's making sense. It made me think if I can live a normal gay life, not having the burdens that I am carrying now. Thinking of stands on statements just like what the pope said that saving humanity from homosexuality is as important as saving the rainforest. Whoah! Isn't he suppose to unite the world and not cause havoc by giving irresponsible speaches? I am not into issues like Cha-Cha but if it will have an impact to the gay community, you'll see march on the streets shouting at the top of my throat. Going back, I decided to remain the way I am. An activist. Even if my mother is asking me for a grandchild but I have no intention of giving her one because of a three word statement:

I

am

gay...

Live with it mom! Hehehe. I would like to thank her because my outfit were her tights and body fit long sleeves, the malong was mine. I can still remember her reaction when I wore my costume in the Pride March. She can't look at me straight in the eyes. At that very moment, I still felt that she has not yet totally accepted me for what I am. Although it seems like she's comfortable calling me Juday, or Judy Anne, her other term for JUDING.

++++++++++++++++

Right now, I just went home from a meeting about my organization GABAY. It was an exhausting discussion of several plans and targets for the year 2009 but I believe it's all worth it since my core members are willing to help in order to achieve our goals for this year. What added to my excitement is the idea that there are new people who went earlier who are interested in joining us as an affiliate organization in our team. We welcomed them wholeheartedly as they promised to participate in our events that are beneficial to this country's young LGBTs.


I opened my computer, was about to log in to http://www.friendster.com/ and before going to that site, I was able to read my horoscope for the Year 2009 (courtesy of http://shine.yahoo.com/page/2009-horoscope):


Career:

The Aquarian energy of 2009 encourages you to weave new dreams into peoples' lives, and to help them feel at home in the world. Success grows as exemplify your visions, attracting people who appreciate your compassion to raise their consciousness to a new level. In your service to help others realize deeper realities, you become more aware and sensitive to your own connection to the powers that be.



Your profound ability to explore transformation and share wisdom with large communities helps you find a welcome place in society. The love you discover through your own transformation will bring abundant manifestations for others. As you help people heal their consciousness, they can more easily find sanctuary from harsh realities. Your sensitivity to their needs reaches into the deepest realms of a their psyche.

For those who wish also to support change in the world, emotional affinity comes easily between you and your peers. From time-to-time this year, step back and reflect on the deeper purpose of your life's work. Be sure to make decisions that match your own objectives, values and goals, and don't allow yourself to be swayed by others desires. Maintain your individuality. Getting in touch with your dreams will help you know which direction is best to take in your effort to expand your beliefs and be of service in a much larger way.

At the first glimpse of my horoscope for this year, I was surprised to see these words. I was motivated to excel more on what I am doing right now which is my advocacy on gay rights and helping younger LGBT people reach their full potential despite being discriminated in this society. Do I have to believe this? My answer is simple, it is man who creates his own destiny, and since this prediction is quite challenging, I will make sure it will happen...

May this be a good head start for 2009 and hopefully, me and my team can change the society in our own little ways for the future generation of the beckies alike.

Did I make sense?

Whatever... hahahaha.
May mali ba sa grammar, walang pakialamanan, blog ko toh, Ahihihihi.

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Againts the World

It's been so long since I posted in my blog but I suppose it's not too late for me to show how I feel about the Manila Pride March 2008. Ane before ending the year 2008, I need to express my points whether many people will get mad at me.

It was colorful and joyful event. I was wearing my national costume and my organization won the "Best Float Award". At the back of our float was a statement: "WE EXALT YOU JESUS", confirming our love for GOD and that we believe and have faith in him despite our imperfections.

With us are discriminators using the bible as their weapon.

Try watching the video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7E6ckFgsHE&NR=1

Preacher: Cause we believe that God has a design. God made up Adam and Eve. He did. He solved it.... So he created a woman. He didnt create another man.... So it's God's design. Now again Im emphasizing, A Homosexual, we believe it's sin.
Yffar: Literal meanings of the bible??? Not thinking of the "sitz im leben". yes, it was God's design to create Adam and Eve in the begining. They were straight, but not all of their children. Isn't King David, the greatest king in Bible History Bisexual???

Girl 1: Diba ang nilikha ng Diyos ay babae and lalaki.Tapos, Yung mga bakla, lalaki talaga sila. Nagrerebelde sila sa Diyos at nagsisinungaling sila. Pinagkalooban sila na maging lalaki pero gusto nilang maging babae. Ang ibig sabihin, yun na, nagrerebelde sila. At nagsisinungaling sila sa lahat ng taong nandito na babae sila pero ang katotohanan na lalaki sila. kasi di ba yun choices nila na maging ganun pero yung sinasabi nila na free will pero yung ginagawa na yun ay kasalanan sa Diyos may limitation yung mga freewill na nararanasan ng tao.
Yffar: Who set the limitation of freewill? It is man himself. You. have you done your study or taken any basic Psychology on homosexuality? To say that all gays wants to be women? Well im gay and i wanted to stay as a man and not to be a girl. Isa pa, we are not rebels, if we are againts God, why are we doing good deeds to our fellow men...

Girl 2: Magkaroon po kami ng bunga po na mareach out ung iba sa kanila na nagnanais talagang magbago. Kasi talaga hindi kami naniniwala na wala sa kanila na gusto talagang magbago eh. para ring nga gusto talagang mareachout talaga kung anong meron sa kanila ngayon.
Yffar: Unfortunately, you were not able to get people from us who wanted to change. Because that is what Gay Pride is all about! We are free to be what we want to be.

Foreigner (as i heard it) : We have beautiful women in Philippines, why do men marry men. Do not support this evil act. Is a taboo. Is abomination (?). Is it bawa (?) Do not support this evil act. A man should live with a father and a mother, married to a woman, not to a???? Man! Because if you do that, you are destroying the generation. because life will not come in to existence. I dont see the reason why we have beautiful ladies in Philippines, and our men are marrying each other. And we are celebrating this ceremony..
Yffar: yes, we are happy that we have beautiful women in our country. but it does not equate to man marrying men?! it is called LOVE! The freedom to choose who we want to live with for the rest of ourlives. and please do not use the word "WE", you're not a filipino and say that it behalf of the majority of this country's population.

Some Posters:
"God Hates Sin"
"It's not ok to be gay, it's sin"
"Kinapopootan ng Diyos ang lahat ng mga gumagawa ng kasamaan"
"Turn or Burn"
"Malagim ang kasasapitan ng mga taksil at mapakiapid tuloy papunta sa Impyerno"
Yffar: God also taught you guys that who ever does not have any sin, he can casts the first stone. Oh God, you are not following Jesus' instructions!

Other Hate Vids:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_RzGDKXlWk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u26GIY17gB8

To all:
BELATED MERRY XMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR and be PROUD of WHAT YOU ARE WITH OUT STEPPING ON OTHER PEOPLE'S IDENTITY AND RESPECT EACH INDIVIDUAL AS TO HOW MUCH YOU WANTED OTHERS TO RESPECT YOU.

Why cant we digest the idea that being homosexual is normal and let us live a normal life. If we are truly accepted, we wont be lobbying for any anti-discrimination bill, march every december, nor me posting this kind of message in this website!

Many homosexuals died and were murdered because the gay killers claim that it is written in the bible to punish homosexuals for it is abomination. Did God teach us to kill our fellow men just because it is written in the so-called sacred scripture!

GAY PRIDE is not one of the 7 Deadly Sin and is not even the opposite of the christian value humility. It is a celebration of Diversity of what God made us and despite of unacceptance, we are still going to fight for what we think is right in this conservative and blind confirmist society...

STOP THE HATE!

I am Yffar, I am Gay. Live with it!

I love you all...

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Halo-Halo Thoughts: Personal Entry Muna

Busy.

Yan ang status ng buhay ko ngayong buwan ng Oktubre. Matagal-tagal rin bago ako makapagpost ng bagong katha sa blog na ito. Kahit ang makapagsurf sa internet ay isang bagay na mahirap magawa sa dami ng trabahong dapat asikasuhin. At siyempre, ang serye ng mga kaganapan sa aking buhay na halos ikawindang ng lola nyo.

Episode 1: Ang Pagkasira ng Laptop

Oh yes, napakabait sa akin ng kapalaran at nagulat na lamang ako na sira pala ang aking laptop. Kinailangan itong i-reformat at nabura lahat ng files kasama na ang 46 pages na online meeting ng Rainbow Bloggers Philippines at ang aking mga entries para sa Rosas. Unfortunately, wala akong draft mga ito dahil derecho sa pageencode ang aking mga ginagawa. Mabuti na lamang at naayos ito ng aking workwate na IT master. Kaso, nakakahinayang lahat ng porn videos at nude pictures na pinakatago-tago.

Episode 2: Ang Aking Resignation at Pagbabalik Eskwela

After three years na tumigil ako sa pag-aaral, ako'y magbabalik na ulit sa DLSU-Manila and the price I have to pay is resigning to my current job. Anjoray. Lagi akong absent sa work para asikasuhin ang aking returnee status. Andaming cute guys, nakakalula. Hahahaha. Kaya ayon, pagkabalik sa work, kailangang i-back track lahat ng pending. Anyways, super mamimiss ko lahat ng workmates ko, kasi napamahal na sila sa akin. Ang sabi ko na lang sa kanila, babalik balik ako sa office namin para magtinda ng AVON.

Episode 3: Ang Iba't ibang Organisasyon

Malapit ng mag December, hindi dahil malapit nang magPasko, malapit na kasi ang Pride March at kailangan kong makahanap ng mga dadalo at magmamarcha. Lalakarin ko rin ang SEC registration ng GABAY, ang aking organization. May Sports Fest pa akong aayusin sa November. Daming deadlines na hinahabol. Pero kaya ito, isa akong bakla, lalong tumatatag kapag napapasubo!

Episode 4: Ang aking karamdaman sa Puso

Sa sobrang daming ginagawa, hindi na ako makapagpatingin sa doctor. Lagi kasi akong nakakaranas ng paninikip ng dibdib at pananakit ng batok. Mukhang high blood nga ata ako. pero hindi ito maaari, ang hula sa akin ay mamamatay ako sa edad na 60, at tatandang mayaman, hindi kagaya ng kaibigan ko, ang hula sa kanya ay mamatay siya ng wala pang 30. Hay naku, ibig sabihin, kailangan niyang mamatay bago mag 3o para yumaman ako? Hahaha. Hula lang yun, pero nagkatotoo kasi lahat ng hula niya sa akin gaya ng pagreresign ko sa Call Center two years ago. Ay, ang di lang ata magkakatotoo, ay ang hula sa akin na magkaka-apo ang mga magulang ko sa akin. Sorry sa aking ama at ina, wala po akong matres.

Episode 5: Ang Paghahanap ng Mga Nawawalang Wala

Bago ako umalis sa kumpanya, kailangan walang back log, kaya lahat ng mga dokumento ay kailangang ma-endorse. Kaya ang oras ko ay nakatuon sa pageendorse. Kasama na rito ang mga nawawalang dokumento, na hindi ko na naman dapat problemahin pero nahanap ko. Nakakaloka rin ang paghahanap ko sa mga papeles na ibinigay daw sakin subalit wala naman sa mga files ng aplikante. Aba, nawindang ako sa kakahanap, wala naman pala talagang ibinigay sa akin, nasa aplikante pa rin, kasi xerox lang ang ibinigay. Che. Ayan, nakahanap ako ng wala.

Episode 6: Dobulyu Dobulyu Dobulyu Dat Rainbow HaloHalo Dat Com

Bilang pagseseryoso, on the process na ang http://www.rainbowhalohalo.com/ kasabay ng http://www.gabay.org/. Siyempre, kailangan bago rin ang template. Ang problem, Biology major po ako at hindi programmer. Hahahaha.

At after ng post na itech, ang pamamahinga ng Diwata ng Bahaghari ay nagwakas na...

P.S.At siyempre, salamat sa mga bumoto sa akin sa TiTi Awards. May Titi na rin ako! Winner

Balik Blogging na ulit akesh!

ECHOS!

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LiveJournal Poems: Reconstructing my Teen-Age Secret Love for HIM

Hay... Ang sarap alalahanin ng mga poems na sinulat ko noong teen ager pa ako. Lalo na noong patago akong umiibig kay *toot*, ang kaklase kong lalaki. Bago basahin ang mga tulang ito ay basahin muna ang Lihim na Pagtingin: Goodbye My Assassin....

*****************************************

"UNTITLED"
[Sep. 17th, 200405:07 pm]

Sabi nila
“Masayang magmahal”
Ang sabi ko
“May minahal na ako”
Sabi nila
“Masarap mahalin”
Ang tanong ko
“May nagmahal ba sa akin?”
Ilang beses na akong umibig
Ilang ulit na akong nasaktan
Subali’t ang puso ko’y
Nauuhaw sa pagmamahal
Na hindi mo nasuklian
Ang aking Pag-ibig
Pag-ibig na balewala
Pag-ibig na sinayang
Pag-ibig na pinaglaruan
Masakit mang tanggapin
Ito’y aking tiniis
Nguni’t kinalabasan
Puso ko’y naghinagpis
Hanggang ngayo’y aking bitbit
Mga salitang binitiwan mo sa akin
Na may mahal ka nang iba
At hindi ako ang iyong irog
Gumuho ang aking mundo
Kay saklap
Kay hirap
Hindi na yata mabubuo
Pira-piraso kong daigdig
Na malapit nang magunaw
Kailan pa?
Kailan kaya?
Mawawala ang tulad mo
Sa aking gunita
Kay hirap
Nakakapagal
Mapapahilom pa ba
Ng panahon ang aking pusong sugatan?
Minahal kita
Higit kanino man.
Subali’t bakit
Bakit?Bakit ang kapalit ng aking pag-ibig
Ay hamak na pakikipagkaibigan?!

*****************************************

Panaginip
[Aug. 18th, 200411:13 am]

Ikaw ang laging laman ng aking panaginip
Sa tuwina'y naglalaro sa aking isip
Bakit? Bakit ba ako pinahihirapan
Nitong aking kakatwang nararamdaman
Araw-araw naman tayong nagkikita
Subali't lagi kang hanap ng aking mata
Nais kong laging hawak ang iyong kamay
Mahaplos ang buhok mong itim ang kulay
Oras-oras, bawat saglit, tila naririnig
Ang iyong natatangi at magandang tinig
Oh giliw ko, ako nga ba'y isang hangal?
Isang hunghang sa iyong pagmamahal?
Mamayang gabi..sa aking pagtulog
Sa Poong Maykapal aking idudulog
Na sa aking panaginip, ika'y makasama
Kahit sa paniginip lang, oh sana, oh sana

*****************************************

Darating ang umaga

[Sep. 17th, 200412:23 pm]

Inamin ko na nga na mahal kita
OO, mahal na nga kita
Subalit,
Maraming balakid
Maraming dahilan kung bakit hindi tayo dapat magsama
Sadya bang hindi tayo itinadhana ng Maykapal?
O kay lupit ng kapalaran
Nais ko man ay hindi pa rin maari
Paglalayuin tayo ng panahon
Panahong malapit nang dumating
Kahit na sabihin kong mahal kita
OO mahal na mahal kita
Hindi pa rin maari
May ibang nagmamahal sa’yo
Subali’t higit ang pagmamahal ko
Pag-ibig man ay iaalay
Tadhana na ang magpupumilit na tayo’y paghiwalayin
Kay hirap tanggapin
Darating ang isang umaga
Ikaw at ako’y magigising
Na hindi tayo magkikita
Mga mata nati’y di na magtatagpo
Dalisay mong tinig ay hindi ko na maririnig
Sa panaginip na lang ba kita mamahalin
May magagawa ba ako upang ang puso natin ay mapag-isa
Upang hindi na dumating ang umagang
Masama ang ibinabadya?
Mahal na nga kita
OO mahal na kita
Hindi ba’t halata naman!
Araw – araw, lagi kitang kapiling
Pintig ng puso ko’y
Iyo bang naririnig?
O sadyang nabibingi ka
Sa ibang taong nagpaparamdam na ika’y kanyang iniibig
Darating ang umaga
Hindi pag-asa ang dala
Subali’t pighati sa aking pusong

Ang tanging hinahanap ay ikaw na
Napalapit na sa aking kaluluwa
Darating ang umagang
Ang distansya nati’y dalawang daigdig ang pagitan
Subali’t dumating man ang umagang iyon
Aking sasabihin sa iyo
Mahal kita
OO, mahal na mahal kita…….

*****************************************

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LiveJournal Repost: Bakit Ganun? (My Denial)

Hinanap ko ang aking livejournal account... Ang username ko pa that time is mystical_blue. Baklang bakla di ba. Since 2004 pa pala ako nagba-blog, sana apat na taon na pala akong nagsusulat. Pero, for me mas mabuti na 'to. Kasi ang account na iyon ay puro denial. Pagtanggi sa totoong pagkatao ko.

This is the concrete proof, try reading it:

****************************************************

Mystical_Blue (mystical_blue)
wrote,@ 2004-10-08 02:04:00



bakit ganun??

bakit kaya ganun?tanungin daw ba nila ako kung seryoso ako sa pinagsasabi ko na bading ako..wahahahahahahaha :)

Ito lang masasabi ko dun. Bahala na yung mga tao kung anong isipin nila sa akin. Kung iniisip nila na bading ako, bahala sila. Kasi hindi ko naman hawak yung paniniwala nila at sabihin kong mali ang iniisip nila di ba. Natutunan ko yun kay chastine, na I have to let them think what they want to think.

Kakaiba rin ang reaction nila Coco. Kasi si Chastine hinihintay na mag-Friday, eh may nagtanong kung bakit. Ang sabi ko, sa Friday, ikakalat ko na bading ako.. kaya ayun, tawa ng tawa sina Coco.. napatingin sa akin bigla.. wahahahahahah.. alam ko naman na noon pa eh ganun na ang tingin nila sa akin eh :) bahala na nga lang sila...



Bakit ako napagkakamalang bading:
* I am feminine (not a natural trait of a typical guy). Girly ako kumilos. Kung alam lang ng mga tao ang buong buhay ko, malalaman nila kung bakit ganun ako.... isa pa, madaldal ako. anong magagawa ko, it's my asset... :)

****************************************************

Perhaps I would be posting more of the reposts from my Live Journal Account how I lived in denial and loved secretly. If you were able to read the Lihim na Pagtingin: Goodbye My Assassin, mapapansin na ito rin ang emotions na mayroon ako.

****************************************************

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Pride Season is ON!

As much as possible, ayokong magpost ng too personal na posts sa blog na itech. Dapat relevant sa buhay buhay bilang isang bakla. Kaso since ako'y isang bakla, perhaps ang post ko na ito ay magiging relevant naman kasi ako nga naman ay isang bading. Echos!

Yesterday, 3:30 am ako nagising para mag-encode ng proyekto ng aking mahal na kapatid. Ano pa nga bang magagawa ko eh sobrang hindi ko siya mahindian. Ginagawa ko lang naman ang tungkulin ko bilang nakakatandang kapatid. Yun lang, napaka-aga ko nagising at derecho pasok kaya haggard. Habang nagbro-browse ng emails, may nabasa akong announcement na may meeting ang Task Force Pride ng 6:00pm sa Cafe Molinari sa Quezon City, malapit sa Quezon City Hall. Ang Task Force Pride nga pala is a network of LGBT individuals and organizations na nagtutulong-tulong sa pagcecelebrate ng Pride Month.

Instead na sumama ako sa dinner sa korean restaurant at magpakabundat, naisip ko na lang na magpunta sa meeting na ito sapagka't ito ang annual commitment ko. Hay. Nakatulog pa nga ako sa FX dahil sa sobrang pagod, Ito na ang pangatlong taon na ako'y sasali sa naturang parada. Winner. Kagaya last year, naramdaman ko ang saya sa paglalakad para sa equal rights ng mga bakla.

Nakarating ako sa venue ng quarter to 7. Ang saya ko kasi kasama ako sa mga nakadalo upang pagplanuhan ang Pride March 2008. Kasama sa mga natalakay ang possible dates at venue. Target dates namin ay sa December 5, 6, at 7 at ang mga napipisil na venue ay sa Makati, Manila, or sa Quezon City. Ang magiging partisipasyon ng organisasyon ko ay ang Sports Festival sa November na dadaluhan ng iba't ibang LGBT organisasyon sa Pilipinas. Bongga! Grabeh excited na ako. If mababasa to nila Wilberchie and yung ibang bloggers na diwatang kagaya ko, you are all invited!

On the other side, noong kaming tatlo na lamang nina Del at Calvz, madami kaming natalakay about LGBT issues. Todo sa brainstorming. Kasi in the near future, kaming tatlo ay magiging full time na makikibaka tungkol sa karapatan ng mga bakla. As of now, in our own simple ways, gusto muna naming makatulong sa LGBT community. Parang ako, dinadaan ko sa pagba-Blog ang aking advocacy.

Isa sa mga quotable quotes naming noong gabing iyon ay ito:

“Ang instinct ng isang straight na lalaki ay makahanap ng isang babae at magkagusto dito. Kaso tayo hindi eh. Kapwa lalaki talaga ang hinahanap natin. And that makes us different.”

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Lihim na Pagtingin: Goodbye My Assassin...

It pays a lot if you’re a gay trying to hide your true identity. You can’t tell anyone how you feel because it’s just between you and yourself who keeps your biggest secret. What’s worst? Hindi mo maamin na mahal mo ang lalaking sobrang iniibig mo. Ang bigat sa loob di ba? Well, naramdaman ko na rin yan and I have a story to tell:

Andrew was my block mate since first year to second year in De La Salle University-Manila sa College of Education. Chinto. Maputi. At first, hindi ko siya masyado napapansin kasi sobrang simple nyang tao. We became closer because we were both officers in our College’s Professional Organization and lagi kaming groupmates sa mga subjects namin. I enjoyed working with him because of his childish acts. Parehas kaming mahilig sa anime’ and naglalaro ng Ragnarok at DOTA.

Unti-unti, may kakaiba na akong nararamdaman sa kanya. Lagi ko na siyang gustong makita. Umabot pa sa point na may isang trimester na wala kaming subject na magkapareho, pero sa sobrang eager ko na maging magkakaklase kami, I had to change my scheduled courses and replaced it with a course where we can be classmates. Hanggang sa panaginip, he’s there. I always see myself lying in bed with him. Pagkagising ko, I’m quite confused but a part of me is wishing na sana totoo yun.

Sa mga occasions sa school na kami yung mag-aassist, sabay kaming magbihis ng corporate sa male’s rest room. Kaso ‘di ko magawang tingnan siya, kaya napapatalikod ako. Though natetempt ako, I’m still trying not to look at his nakedness. May mga time na magkatabi kaming matulog pero hindi ko naiisip na hawakan siya at may mangyari sa amin, ayokong mawala ang pagkakaibigan namin kahit na deep na ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya.

Nagseselos ako kapag may lumalapit sa kanya at nilalandi siya ng mga OUT na bakla. Parang gusto kong makasaksak ng lapis. Bawal yun, baka mapadala ako sa Discipline Office. Hindi rin naman maiiwasan na magsabi siya sa akin na may gusto siyang babae. Anong magagawa ko, straight siya. Nagkaroon pa nga ng fair and may picture ng babaeng crush nya. Nakikipag-unahan ako mabili lang yung picture na yun at maibigay lang kay Andrew.

Nagkaroon ng issue about my sexuality kasi lagi ko siyang kasakasama. I had to deny it and the officers of the organization held a meeting just to clarify things. Ang lumalabas kasi, some officers are using Andrew para lang madetermine kung ano ba talaga ako. Kaya I decided not to go near Andrew any more. Mahirap, pero ginawa ko para di lang mapag-usapan ulit ang pagkatao ko and nagfocus ako sa work as an officer of the said organization.

Lunch break, magkakasama kaming kumain sa Agno. Andrew was there. Hindi ko siya kinakausap. Kaso bigla niya akong niyakap. Hala! Tumigil ang mundo ko. Natulala na lang ako sa sobrang gulat. He was trying to say sorry, pero hindi niya naman sinabi kung totoo yung mga rumors na kumakalat. Hindi ko na lang pinansin yun, napag-isip ko na mas magiging masaya ako kung makakasama ko pa rin siya. And as a sign na ok na kami, binigyan ko pa siya ng poster ng Assassin, favorite niya sa Ragnarok, ako naman Priest.

Dumating yung time na dumadalas ang pag-absent ni Andrew sa school. Tinatawagan ko pa siya para pumasok. May mga projects pa siya na hindi napapasa. I offered him na ako na lang gagawa ng mga unfinished projects niya kaso hindi niya ako pinayagan. His parents decided to transfer him to another school. Hindi ko matanggap. Nagtago ako sa fire exit ng Yuchenco Building para lang umiyak. Ako lang mag-isa. Dahil wala namang nakakaalam ng aking nararamdaman. Pagkalabas ko, Andrew was there. Tinanong kung bakit namumula ang mga mata ko, wala na akong sinabi at naglakad palayo sa kanya. Ilang araw rin akong umiiyak kasi hindi ko na siya makakasama. Wala akong matakbuhan kasi hindi ko pa sinasabi sa kahit na sino ang totoo kong pagkatao. Sinong makikinig sakin?

Nagshift na nga siya ng course and nagpatuloy ng study sa ibang university. Minsan nagtetext kami. Hanggang sa huling pagkakataon na magkasama kami, hindi ko naamin sa kanya na minsan sa buhay ko, minahal ko siya ng lubos. Ang tanging alaala na naiwan sakin eh ang post card ng sugatang Assassin na nakatalikod at isang Priestess na umiiyak, sumisimbolo sa aming dalawa (nacocornihan ako pero totoo). And dahil sa mga nangyari, minabuti ko na lang na hindi magkagusto sa straight, siya na ang una't huling straight na lalaking mamahalin ko.

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Tag-Ulan na Naman

Tag-ulan na naman

Sa aking pag-uwi
Binabaybay ko ang Karagatan ng Taft Avenue
Nararamdaman kong ang tubig sa aking sapatos

nagmimistulang aquarium
Sa tuwing ako’y tumatawid sa Pedro Gil River
Kailangan ko pang mag bayad ng Php.10.00

Toll Fee makatawid lamang sa kabilang ibayo
Doon ay makakasakay ako ng barko

Biyaheng Dakota Harizon Plaza
Dadaan ang naturang barko sa Ilog ng Nakpil
Dumurungaw ako

Kung may mga gwapo

Mga kalalakihang nakatambay
malamang tag-ulan
nagtatago ang mga nilalang ng karagatan
kaya mga palaka lamang ang makikita

Palakang kahit umuulan

ay naghahanap ng booking
Kapag nakarating na ako sa Kapuluan ng Leveriza
malapit sa Isla ng Manila Zoo
may mag-aalok ng,
“Boss, Side Car?!”
mas minamabuti kong maglakad na lamang
kahit bali na ang isang tangkay ng aking Japanesse Style Pink Payong
Habang naglalakad ay aawit ako na rock version

"Walking in the Rain"
o kaya

"I can Make it Through The rain"

Parang isang baliw

Ineengganyo ko lamang ang aking sarili

Dahil kinakalaban ko ang Habagat

Niyayakap ko ang bawat patak ng ulan
Nakakapagod ang paglalakbay
Sa tuwing nasa bahay na ako

at matutulog
Napakaalamig ng aking gabi

Kahit nakapatay ang electric fan
dahil ako’y mag-isa
walang kayakap kundi ang aking unan

Naghihintay ng mga text sa celfone

Ilang sandali na lamang ay papatak ang aking luha

Kasabay ng pag-ulan sa labas ng aming tahanan

Sapagka't sa tuwing umuulan

Maraming alaala ang nagbabalik

Malungkot...

At ako'y dadalawin ng antok

Kinabukasan...

Papasok na naman

Lalandasin ang mahabang karagatan

Nakikinig sa "Balasubas at Balahurang" Tambalan

Nag-aabang ng bahaghari sa kalangitan

Na magsasabing tapos na ang ulan
Ganito ang aking araw-araw na pakikipagsapalaran
dahil...

Tag-ulan na Naman

(emote lang)

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Aim High TransPinay...

I have a lot of transgender friends. Yes, they dress, act, and speak like a real woman does. Most of them are even prettier than REAL girls, with emphasis on the word REAL. Defining what a transgender is, they are people people who are biologically born as males but emotionally and psychologically thinks that they are females, and vice versa. When they surgically changed their genitals, they are now called transexuals. Also, Gays and lesbians are different from transgenders. So many terms and but the bottom line is they are girls or boys trapped in an opposite genders' body. For more enlightenment, click on this link: LGBT Terms & Definitions.

How do we deal and be friends with them? Here are some of my personal tips based on my experiences with my transgender friends. We should acknowledge them by using the right pronouns in any conversation. Use SHE and HER and not HE, HIS, or HIM when referring to a male transgender. Also, call them by their preferred names and not with what is written in their birth certificates. If Paulo wants you to call HER Paula, don't dare call HER Paulo, otherwise, you'll receive a slap on your face. Never mention that SHE has male attributes. Please do not tell HER that SHE has an Adam's apple or she doesn't have any boobies, this might lessen HER self confidence. Maker HER realize that SHE is beautiful. We should treat them like real women with proper courtesy. Finally, when you are with transgender people, you should have deeper understanding and acceptance of who they are. I enjoy being with my transgender friends. Although they differ in identities. Some of them are very sophisticated and have deep personalities. But there are also those who keeps me laughing and I have no dull moments when they are around.

Presenting Dhel, obviously she's the one in the picture. She's one of my closest friends in our organization. Sobrang dami niyang insights about being a transgender. There are times na kapag nag-uusap kami eh bigla na lang niyang sasabihin na "ang ganda ganda ko noh". Hehehe. She definitely is. Isa sa mga natutunan ko sa kanya is "if you want to be respected, show them that you should be respected". Well, ang gusto niyang sabihin eh kung transgender ka, wag mong ipakita sa mundo na kabastos bastos ka. Bakla ka na nga eh. Siya kasi, kapag nanamit, sobrang simple. Hindi yung naka mini-skirt and kita pati kaluluwa. No matter how beautiful you are, if you won't act accordingly, pagiging tampulan ka talaga ng discrimination.

Some of the transgenders are actively fighting for LGBT rights in our country. Just like Ate Pau and Ate Sass who are both members of Ang Ladlad LGBT Party. Kapag nagsama ang dalawang ate ko na yan, super kwela ng tandem. There is also an organization which focuses on the needs of the Filipina transgenders and that is STRAP or the Society of Transsexual Women of the Philippines. Click on the links for more information about Ang Ladlad and STRAP.

One of the most obvious scenario in the LGBT community is the war between Transgenders and Discreet Gays/ Bisexuals. Kapag nakakakita ang mga discreet kuno ng mga transgender, ang reaction kaagad eh "Yuck EFFEM", however, kapag nakakita naman ang mga transgender ng mga padiscreet, bigla silang babahing ng malakas sabay sabi ng "PAMINTA!". Hopefully, mahinto na sana ang mga ganitong bangayan. Iisang komunidad lang po tayo, whether you're discreet, transgender, or kahit kalahating paminta at binabae, lahat tayo'y kapwa nakakaramdam ng hindi wastong pagtanggap ng lipunan...

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Where's the Intensity 8 earthquake?!

~~~~~~~~~

1. I knew it, hindi siya totoo. Keme keme lang yung jijierang prophet na nagpredict na magkakalindol na sobrang lakas dito sa Pilipinas. Parang chismis, ambilis kumalat. I was awake from 12 midnight until now and literal nga na wala akong tulog. Hindi ko naman inabangan yung lindol di ba. Hehehe. Nagkataon lang na kailangan kong tapusin ang maraming bagay sa bahay. Pero if magkatotoo yun, ang gusto ko, magkasama kami ng taong mahal ko.

~~~~~~~~~

2. I tried changing the lay-out of my blog kanina. Siyempre naninibago pa kasi Education Major naman po ako at walang masyadong alam sa mga HTML eklat. Anyways. Nagdownload ako sa site ng mga blog lay outs. Damn. nawala lahat ng page elements na pinaghirapan ko. Including yung mga links ng mga blogger na binabasa ko yung mga post every day. Natense akesh ng bonggang bonga. Napilitan akong mag-online hanggang madaling araw para lang bawiin lahat ng dapat ibalik sa blog. Ayan, intrimitida kasi ang lola mis. Pero infairness, ang ganda ng kinalabasan ng bagong lay-out. Konting common sense lang pala.

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3. Nandito ako sa computer para maglaro sana ng Cabal. Kaso hindi ako makasingit kasi madaming addict at busy lahat ng servers. Hindi rin ako makalaro ng Dota kasi wala naman akong kalaban. Kaya here I am, nag-aayos lang ng blog.

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4. At first gusto ko magpost lang ng magpost sa Blog. Kaso naisip ko na , if magpopost ako, sana yung may sense. Kung wala na akong maisip, dapat something funny para kahit papaano may magbasa. Hehehe. As of now, wala na nga akong maisip na itype kasi borlogs na ako. Para akong may hang-over.

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5. Kanina pa ako nakakarecive ng mga text messages na nagsasabing na suntukan daw kami. Abah, hindi ako mahilig sa digmaan. Ang last na pakikipagsuntukan ko is nung Grade 5 pa ako. Nang malaman ko, current boy friend pala yun ng x-girl friend ko. Mukhang galit na galit. Bakit? Dahil ba bakla ako? Silahis nga pala. Ayan, If na boogie akesh at hindi na nakapag-update dahil bali ang braso ko... Ayan.. Alam mo na what happened to me.

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6. At nagsama sama na nga ang TRES CHISMOSAS ng baranggay namin. At sinong topic? Malamang kasama akesh. Nakikita daw ako sa malate humahada? Kaya wala daw akong pera. Hallur! Tanga ba ako para gawin yun. I don't need to pay for sex, I can have it any time I want If sobrang desperado ako no. May MIRC at Yahoo chat naman. Isa pa, how can they say na humahada ako eh nakita ba nila akong nagdadasal na may nakatambad na pumipintig na saba sa mukha ko? Ang buhay na naman parang life.

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7. Habang nag-eencode ng mga changes ng blog na toh, napansin ng mga katabi kong gamers na may kakaiba akong way sa pagpress ng ENTER. Isipin nyo na ang pinangpipindot ko ay ang aking middle finger, nakapilantik ang index finger, at nakabaluktot ang aking small finger. Imagine the picture. hahaha. Di ko mapigilang tumawa kasi ginagaya nila yung ginagawa ko sa pagpress ng Enter sa keyboard.

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8. Dahil sobrang antok na ako, I have to press PUBLISH POST para makauwi na ako. I don't own a PC kaya rent lang muna akechiwa. Notice to the PUBLIC: If may mga grammatical at typographical errors ako, pakipost na lang sa comment. Hindi ko na babaguhin yung post na toh pero para matawa ako na kung ano anong pinagsusulat ko habang nananaginip na.

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My Pink Goverment

President na ako ng Pilipinas? Di nga? Hindi ako makapaniwala. 21 years old pa lang ako para maging pangulo ng Pinas. Aba! Winner ang lola nyo. At least natalbugan ko ang Nepal na may first politician lang. Eh akesh, first leader ng buong bansa. Hindi lang sa Asia nakapagbreak ng record, maybe sa buong mundo pa di ba?! Biruin mo yun, hindi lang si Pacqiao ang nagbigay ng karangalan sa bansa, ako rin na isang bading. May world record na, title holder pa.

Mahirap yata ang katungkulan bilang isang pangulo. Hindi na akech makakaparty sa Malate kapag Sabado kasi baka may mga magbanta sa aking buhay. At kung papayagan man nila, baka may kasamang Presidential Body Guards pa. Hays.. Hindi yun enjoy. Well, that would be the price to pay if you will become a public servant. You really have to sacrifice a lot of personal happiness and focus on the responsibilities vested upon you. Naalala ko si Princess Emeraude sa anime na Magic Knight RayEarth, bilang haligi ng Sipiro, kailangan nyang magdasal para sa ikabubuti ng lahat ng nasasakupan niya, at kinailangan niyang iwanan ang lahat ng personal na kaligayahan. Boring din ng buhay niya di ba. Kung lahat sana ng pulitiko ay kagaya ng prinsesang ito, kahit 70% lang ng pag-layo sa pansariling kapakanan, do you think uunlad ang Pilipinas? Aba oo siyempre naman. Mawawala ang graft and corruption na siyang hadlang sa pag-asenso ng bayan natin.

Ano kaya ang mga presidential decrees na ipapatupad ko? Hmmm. Una sa priority ko ang Anti-Discrimination Bill na hanggang ngayon ay ipinaglalaban namin. Kailangang alisin ang maling pakikitungo sa mga miyembro ng LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) community. Kailangan nating maisakatuparan ang naturang batas dahil makakamit lamang natin ang tunay na kasarinlan kung may pantay pantay na karapatan kahit ano pa man ang iyong kasarian. Let’s face it, hindi lang racial discrimination ang talamak noh, pati ang gender discrimination. Hahayaan ba nating may mga lesbiana pang ipagahasa ng kanilang mga magulang? Oh ang pagbugbog sa mga bakla dahil hindi matanggap kung ano sila? Ang masigawan nga lang na BAKLA oh TOMBOY eh isang uri na ng diskriminasyon. Kailangan na itong matigil. As in now na! Kalaboso ang hatol sa mga magdidiscriminate sa atin.

Mukhang mahirap tanggapin sa konserbatibong konteksto ang “same sex marriage”, kung hindi ko man ito maipatupad, ipagpipilitan ko pa rin ang pagsulong nito. Sa aking point of view, hindi lang ito para maging legal ang samahan ng mag-asawang bahagi ng LGBT Community, magkakaroon din sila ng sense of security at upang makapamuhay ng normal. Hindi lang mga straight ang may karapatang umibig at mabuhay na kasama ng taong mahal nila, lahat tayo ay may pusong pwedeng tumibok sa kung sino man ang naisin nito. Mahaba habang debate ito at kailangan kong mapag-isa ang sangkabaklaan sa Pilipinas upang ipakita sa buong bansa na maraming nag-aasam ng ganitong uri ng kalayaan. Kung hindi talaga papayagan, e di fly ako sa California at maging citizen nila at doon magpakasal. Ang problema lang, hindi ko kayang iwan ang bansang Pilipinas, mahal ko ang bayan ko, kaya hanggang kaya ko, dito pa rin ako magsasabi ng “I DO” sa FIRST GENTLEMAN ko.

Sa aking pamamahala, magkakaroon ng Center of LGBT Affairs. Ito ang bahagi ng pamahalaan na tutulong sa mga batang pinapalayas ng mga magulang dahil sa sila ay bakla o tomboy. Kung maari ay ika-counsel ang mga naturang magulang upang mahalin kung ano man ang kanilang mga anak. At kapag hindi pa rin nila mayakap ang kapalaran ng kanilang mga supling, mga surrogate parents na muna ang mag-aaruga sa kanila hanggang sa sila ay lumaking responsableng bakla na kayang tumayo sa sariling mga paa. Isa pa sa mga programa ng naturang center ay ang pagpapalawak ng mga Home for the Aged na nakafocus sa mga matatandang bakla at tomboy dahil hindi naman lahat ng matatandang LGBT ay may mga pamilyang mag-aalaga sa kanila.

Gusto kong maintindihan ng lahat ng Pilipino kung ano ba talaga ang mga gays, lesbians, bisexuals at transgenders. Tamang edukasyon lang ang kailangan ng mga mamamayan upang maunawaan nila ang aming nararamdaman. Kung ano ba talaga kami. . Before ay kasama kami sa mga may abnormal behaviors, well, studies proved that we’re not. Kami’y mga normal na tao na gusto ring mamuhay ng normal. As much as possible ay nararapat na maisama ito ng Department of Education sa mga kurikulum ng mga mataas at mababang paraan.

Pagyayamanin ng aking administration ang mga hanapbuhay na related sa mga LGBT. Kung tutuusin talented ang mga taong kagaya ko at gagamitin ng bansa ang kanilang talino upang maiangat ang ekonomiya ng Pilipinas.

Oh di ba! Bonggang Bonga ang aking Pink Government. Hindi ko naman babaguhin ang Pambansang Wika mula Tagalog at magiging Gay Lingo, gawing rainbow ang kulay ng watawat, aawitin tuwing flag ceremony ang “Through the Fire” or “Shine” bilang national anthem, at ipoproklama na ang bagong pambansang bayani ay si Danton Remoto. Ang aking plataporma ay nakatuon sa pagpapalawig ng equal rights at pagsagot sa kahirapan.

Teka. Bakit may naririnig akong ring tone. Paulit-ulit. Nakakabingi. Alarm clock lang pala ito ng aking mumurahing cellphone.

At nagising na nga ako. Panaginip lang pala ang lahat. Isang panaginip na sana ay maisakatuparan. Hindi man sa aking kapanahunan ay matamasa sana ng mga susunod na henerasyon ng mga bakla at tomboy ng bansang aking kinabibilangan.

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